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Reflections on Death

Every morning, when I wake, I am overwhelmed with a deep sense of gratitude. A real sense of "Wow! I'm alive!" I must say, it's a great way to start the day, with the profound recognition that today was not a given. The flip side of this is the subtle awareness that one day I will not wake, that one day I will pass on. I often quote a line by a Native American elder; "The problem with your people is that you wake up every day assuming that you will live." I love this because it is so true. Do we not just take it for granted that we have awoken? That we will undoubtedly see out the day? How exactly does this presumption impact the way we live? How many of us truly acknowledge that we and all those that we love and value will one day pass? It seems to me that the prevailing feeling surrounding death in our culture is one of fear. We fear death and so we refuse to accept it as inevitable and essential to life. I have always had a fascinati...

Thoughts Without A Thinker

"You don't think thoughts, thoughts think you." This is a statement I like to share with people that is often met with a look of utter confusion. I will do my best to illustrate what, exactly, I mean when i say this. Without conducting any kind of poll on the matter my assumption is that nine out of ten people (okay, ten out of ten) - if you stopped them on the street - would tell you that they are the thinker of their thoughts. Of course! Who else is thinking my thoughts? Their MINE aren't they? I must admit for a long time I too was under the illusion that I was the author of my thoughts. Only when I began to take note of what was going on in my head that a few things began to appear crystal clear to me. Here's the way I see it. Bear with me as I try to communicate this in the best way I know how. Let's look at this  - Firstly, and most obviously, how do 'you' think? I mean, do you know how to do it, to stop it, to have only 'good thoughts'?...

Meditation: It's Not What You Think

In the past few months, I have been approached more and more by people curious about meditation. Often, they call me to one side and quietly ask, “what’s it all about?” Lately, buzzwords like mindfulness and promises of tranquility and increased calmness, stress relief or better mood  have caught the attention of many people who may not ever have given a second thought to such things. In that sense, it’s a good thing that word is getting out. However, it seems to me that (much in the same way we are fine-tuned to seek quick fixes and a direct hotline to nirvana) people have a tendency to assume that meditation is a bed of roses. There are many misconceptions about the ‘point’ of meditation and the ‘results’ it may deliver.  When I started meditating, my understanding was that it would help me in my ongoing quest to escape the pains of life, or give me much needed go-faster stripes in order to outrun the many demons on my trail. I, too, fell victim to t...

The Bondage of Belief

 I like to share this story with people in order to illustrate the extent to which our pre-conditioned, destructive beliefs manifest themselves as habits in our lives. Many of our experiences as children leave mental footprints. Those footprints take the shape of assumptions or beliefs that we carry on into our adult lives. The acting out of these beliefs, which is often quite unconscious, shapes our relationships with others and our own sense of who we are. When I was about 7 or 8 years old, my parents got divorced. At that time, it was not quite as common to have estranged parents as it is nowadays. I didn't realize it but I had a strong sense that, somehow, I might have been responsible for the break-up. I recognize now the absurdity of such a belief but at the time I was quite unaware that I had assumed responsibility for an event that had absolutely nothing to do with me or my actions. My mother left my father (for a number of complex reasons far beyond the comp...

The Wonder of This

There is something present in this moment that is more obvious than the moment itself. And I believe all of us know it quite intimately. I had the sense as a child that what was looking from my eyes was the same thing that looked back at me from others’ eyes, but I couldn’t put my finger on what that was. At the time, I was being taught the quite contrary idea; that I was a separate, independent, autonomous entity. If you watch small children, it is plain to see they have a really deep sense of connection with the world, without ever thinking about it or questioning it.Children pick up crayons and draw anywhere, on the floor or the walls. They don’t need paper. They draw for the sake of drawing, without intention. There need be no point or purpose. At least not in the sense of aiming to achieve anything. Only once thought begins to develop does the idea, “I’m not very good at drawing” arise. Before then, it’s just not an issue. It is simply play for play’s sake.As we grow older, we ...

Crackhead Mentality

I remember, quite clearly, the first time I tried crack. I'm not sure what the allure of the drug was, exactly, but as I exhaled my first hit, I distinctly recall being thoroughly underwhelmed. And yet, just a few short months later, I’d been smoking it every day since, staying up night after night in an attempt to satisfy the urge for more. The effects of the drug were incredibly subtle – for me, at least. It lacked the wow factor of the other drugs I’d indulged in, and yet it had me hooked. In the blink of an eye, I’d crossed the line from recreational drug user to 'crackhead'. It began to consume my thoughts on a daily basis. I pretended to myself that I could take it or leave it, but was certain to make sure I had enough to get through the night ahead. Afraid that my friends might discover the extent of my using, I became something of a recluse. So what was it that had me coming back for more? During this time, I realised a funny thing. I saw that the mentality t...
Desire and anger are objects of the mind, but the mind is not yours, nor ever has been. You are choiceless, awareness itself and unchanging, so live happily. - Ashtavakra Gita